Friends : Part 2

Some of you who read my blog in the past *the older one* may have recalled a post I made regarding friends. This is my second part to it. It's not really important to have a read through the first part, though you may if you'd like. I'll be telling two stories today about life, in general, and about a friend of mine, who had the misfortune to be involved in an accident.

With the advent of the Internet, handphones, and cars (since at this age many a friend owns or at least is able to use one), it is easily arguable on face value that its easier to maintain friendships and to keep in touch. Right? Perhaps not, and I argue this on a number of factors. The main problem in my opinion is that on an economist level we always face trade offs on what we want to do, and the controlling factor are incentives. Why do we buy Double Decker, instead of Pringles? Why do we go for classes late consistently? Why do we never ever go late for a date? It's all about incentives.

This begs the question of whether we actually do care about menial things. The point that people try to get across always is that the simple things matter (unless if you're Paris Hilton, and even then perhaps it does). Which means that even if its just to compliment this girl on her new blouse she wore at class today, to discuss about DOTA with one of your latest buddies, or even to poke fun at your good ol' high school friend's avatar, its all good. The problem is that we become conditioned to these kinds of things. Indirectly, the Internet is sometimes... too good I suppose, in this sense, as we tend to take things for granted - the incentives are lost due to the ease of communication.

Ever heard of the cliche that goes something like "you only value something when you lose it"? It's true for this case, among others. The fact that we can ring our buddy up through Skype, and MSN him up turns out to be detriment to us, I feel. And it slaps people like me - procrastinators, the hardest. >_>

Which brings me to the next bit of my story. Recently, while back in Malaysia for the holidays, I received news that my friend was involved in an accident. It wasn't a minor one, and was rather bad. Though due to my silly delays (that I did not know where he was, and lack of transport *ugh*), I started to get fearful. Its anxiety, I suppose. When I finally got there, I met up with a lot of my friends, all from my high school at MES. Though I was saddened to see my friend in such a state, it also dawned on me that I have been pretty much ignorant to the others in the process. Heck I didn't even bother to keep tabs on the others while I was back. Worst part was that it took a tragedy like this to finally bring people together.

Btw he has recovered from his injuries, and has gotten much better. Doctors have said that despite his earlier injuries, which have been severe, his rapid recovery is nothing short of a miracle. I'll continue praying for your recovery.

In all cases though, I suppose at the end of the day its big events that shake your life up, that open your eyes to what you have been blinded to before. I only hope that you, can make a difference in your life, and with your friends. Go on, give them a buzz *wink*.

Donnie..

25 July - Friday

Starting from this semester, i will have one extra holiday which is on Friday. Look at the schedule below this post.. No class on Friday.. WOOOOHOOOOO...

Random photo

Okay.. yesterday(Friday).. wasn't bad..

I woke up at 11AM - looking left and right, nobodies home. So i looked up on my laptop for awhile. Recently i got impressed and attracted by the latest online web game which is Travian online. The game is kinda similar to Caesar 3 - which i played around 2 years ago. *crap crap. Anyway, lets back to topic.

After i got myself cleaned up(shower, bathe etc etc) So uhh, what i did, i was so hungry so i went grocery.

Hmm. So there are plenty of snacks i bought..

Left Rm10 after grocery

1 Large Gardenia
3 Cheezys
2 Roller Coaster
1 Nestle Yogurt(orange flavor XD)

What do you think of my lunch would be?

da da!!!!!

I made chicken curry - to be served with Gardenia Bread i bought. The taste was awesome, totally fulfilled and satisfied my appetite on that day, just not spicy enough. However, i had a satisfying and excited lunch XD

p/s Staying alone at home is fun, i can cook anything i want and do anything i wish.

New Semester Schedule

Semester 3

"A year of Theory"

All theory subjects... Duhh

Schedule:
MGT2073 - Business Research Methods
COM2023 - Business Communication
ITM2113 - Multimedia and Communication
ECN2103 - Principles of Economics
MGT2023 - Organizational Behavior

Baca...
Baca...
Baca...
Hafal...
Hafal...
Hafal...

A Sem without using calculator.. Sigh, whole sem without calculating totally challenges my life - Btw, some subjects i had already taken when i was in another college.. but anyway... Learn more no harm.. hopefully.. hope that there will be something for me to learn.

Semester Three Lecturers :D

Previous Semester, Sem two of my first year brought about a whole host of new (and old) personalities. :D Personally I enjoyed a lot of them; always thought that interesting lecturers make learning fun, and the added bonus is that I am not repulsed by the tutorials etc, because well, I like the subject! :P

For Interpersonal Communication, I had two lecturers who previously taught me Psychology in first semester. All of them had love-able traits; Michelle with her tonic and gin thing, not to mention the sweets at the end of her part, Lingesh with his distinct Indian accent (I found it very hard to get the word "single" initially, among other terms), and Raj with his ever occasional cracks about everything (ranging from Psychiatrist-Robertsomeb to Friday nights). Great stuff :D

As for E-commerce, I have no complaints - the lecturer was good - he knew what he was doing. Though of course, some may mention that he was boring... true, to an extent, but I think its more of the material than anything - the topics covered seemed so vast... and scary compared to ITC. He does seem like a nice guy, and does help around (and asks questions) during tutorials ^_^ He did grant me an A

Writing skills - was average... don't know but I think that actually i feel nothing. Did put them on the feedback sheet - don't think Ill name anyone in this case, but I think among all the subjects, I picked up not much from this particular one - true, the English standard is one thing, but I just didn't feel that, maybe i'm better than lecturer? I learnt something significant. It felt like bread and butter stuff (you eat it because there is nothing else?). Tutor was great though - I really felt bad for slamming her during the first two month -

Talking about this lecturer:- Miss Haff
She would be seriously annoyed if i exhort her grammatical error.
She would be nervous when marking my essays.
She would be uncomfortable if my essay written bombastically again.
She really hopes if i could skip her class.
She never loves to see my essays, because she can only mark a tick on it.
She really hopes that an invisible dictionary will be at her side when marking my papers.
She never loves to see me, claimed that my eyes are walking-dictionary.
She tends to speak bombastically to me, however used wrongly, and get my words again.
At the end of the semester, she told me "Brandon, your English can be better, keeps it up"

LOLX

As for Principle of Accounting. My mastered subject. No problem with it. Scored an A.

What do you think of this sem's lecturers? :P

Time to get life back on track

"You can learn more about a guy just by seeing his room, than spending hours and hours out chatting"

A statement that was mentioned to me by a friend of mine from the past, with her trademark warm smile, yet cold, unforgiving tone. If there was a person who could lure you into the safety of a comforting environment, then suddenly twist an ice cold dagger into your back, slowly, and watch you die, well, she probably would be the first person I'll think of who can do that. Perhaps it was a bonus that I was one to be on her good side... but enough about her :P

The day of today was wasted on non-stop Dota, procrastination, and watching the TVB Dramas. Waking up and going back to my room, I was so shocked at the condition of my room - it looked like a tsunami came, smashed my room up, and left by the back door (so that no one would know, and it would look like a bloody conspiracy if I ever suggested that such a thing happened). It was just shocking. It was then I thought of that quote. And then I nearly fainted.

I'm still cleaning my room. Studies will... have to come after. (v_v)

What does "Brandon Chen Khin Liong" means...

What Brandon Chen Khin Liong Means

You are full of energy. You are spirited and boisterous. You are bold and daring. You are willing to do some pretty outrageous things. Your high energy sometimes gets you in trouble. You can have a pretty bad temper at times. You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something. You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense. You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic "Type A" personality. You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people. You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts. You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals. You are balanced, orderly, and organized. You like your ducks in a row. You are powerful and competent, especially in the workplace. People can see you as stubborn and headstrong. You definitely have a dominant personality. You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life. You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you. At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself. You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily. You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind. A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable. You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life. You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip. People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is. You are deeply philosophical and thoughtful. You tend to analyze every aspect of your life. You are intuitive, brilliant, and quite introverted. You value your time alone. Often times, you are grumpy with other people. You don't appreciate them trying to interfere in your affairs.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

3 more days =)

Can't wait for college to start! :D

I'm quite excited over what is in store for us in the new semester, though I MAY live to regret saying that, I know ;)

Kinda like how we are excited to finish secondary school and start college. That kind of excitement, I suppose.

Well i got my result for previous semester..

Principle of Accounting - A
Interpersonal Communication - B
Writing Skills - A
Psychology on Human Disorder - A
E-Commerce - B-

3A 2B
GPA - 3.8
CGPA - 3.71

All i can say, being the person who was attended the papers - not bad and i have non to question about my CGPA score which has dropped by 1.0 which is 3.8/4.0 to 3.7/4.0. On this issue, my personal advisory had confronted me yesterday in Discussion Room and articulated all her bombastic English on my face. I left the room after i said "Well, score is amorphous and i tried my best. Plus, my CGPA is still above 3.5/4.0 so i don't think if it has anything gotta to do with me."
...
...
...
...
...
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Whatever, who gives the shit..
HOoRay..........

Annoyed, but for the Better

Sometimes I get annoyed by the smallest things.

"Why is this Excel spreadsheet not working as I want it to?"

"Omg - why did the Pudge hook me?"

"Wa liao - why my laptop shut down o slow?"

"Fuck you streamyx"

"Why does class start so late?"

Okay ignore the last one :p

Seriously, sometimes small things, while you are in your "normal" state, do not even put up a tickle to you. You just move on with life. But sometimes, in your very vulnerable state, things can go wary - just like how a punctured gas tank cannot withstand a simple spark, as compared to one that is well insulated and protected. You get all sorts of people - doing all sorts of things - homicides, abuse, drinking, robbing - keeping it closer to home - sulking, ranting, and so on.

My friends from Blueserver would certainly know me as a person who can easily blow up - especially under the stresses of a clan match. In fact the first ever clan match we played (against Clan DvD) was not just a stroll in a park. It degenerated into what I would vulgarly call, a f~k-fest. Tons of that word was spewed out, and for a minute there I thought that even the mighty superpower in the form of "rap", would be disarmed by this seemingly harmless Dota clan match. What is going on?!

To say that "Hey, things just happen. Live with it!", which is the common reply - there is an overwhelming 65% probability that a reply of this nature will appear on a thread in BS Forums, and possibly in everyday life - only showed the sadness of people when it comes to these kinds of things. Does it seem entertaining? Do you even care? It is not the prerogative of the next person to help, but rather it is one's own prerogative to help himself move on - just that sometimes a helping hand extends far beyond what the other person might think it'll offer.

People can get extremely defensive over money issues, that I agree. Sometimes, yes, I am a pretty defensive person over this issue as well, seeing that in reality I dont own any money - my parents do - but sometimes its about how you conduct yourself. Would you think that the argument "hey, im broke for the moment" holds any water for those who just saw you buy a new leather handbag? *snickers*. Or perhaps a Mini Cooper (or two?). Excuse my blatant exaggerations, but sometimes it just has to be done.

Now, the focus of my annoyance, on this issue has basically to do with "saving". Why SAVING?! WTF? Come on, Brandon, surely saving is how we made ourselves so strong - how you came isolated from family, how you were nurtured - and why everyone is still here and not being ready to be sent back because they cant pay their college fees?! No, I am not talking about THAT saving, but rather saving excessively. Sometimes it is important to remember that while peer pressure may seem bad and all, it is important to think of the big picture as well. Simple gestures give away a person's intention on whether he or she thinks of the group, or about him/herself. I am disappointed that sometimes things move the wrong way, but then I tell myself that its the person opinion, and if I do not like it, I simply 1. leave the group, 2. turn a blind eye, 3. tell the person.

Just to note, a friend of mine recently got robbed and was injured badly when he wanted to accompany his "friend" who in turn didn't want to pay the taxi ride from a dodgy place back to hostel. Think about yourself and others, please. >_> ~ Thats about all I can say. Things may look simple here, but in reality, shit can happen. And I while I hope it does not happen, it is important that we take care of any leaks that can cause ignition (not only between us as friends), but also to cause physical harm by external malicious elements.

A lunch @ Bandar Utama 1 U

1st July 2008 - We(me, my god dad, Ying Jia) went to Bandar Utama. My purpose is to accompany Ying Jia since my God Dad was there to work. I'm damn nice, arent i?.. XD So our first stop at Ikea, Damansara PJ, he(God Dad) bought some furnitures, not sure what were those furniture for.. but the price is quite hostile..

The trip was very monotonous, lacking in variety at first, dull because of nothing to do, only God Dad was busy with his stuffs and me and Ying Jia were like idiots stood there looking around. However the boredom has reached the climax at lunch time whereby undesirable arguments occurred. It was at Oriental Craving, an unknown place for me but listened to my God Dad, this place is known for its hearty and unpretentious home-styled Chinese fare. Oriental Cravings has its regular customers agreeing that dining here is as good as partaking of Mom’s cooking. So familiar are some patrons with the outlet’s offering that they don’t bother with the printed menu.

Okay stop the craps..

We went in, occupied the third seats from left. Lets see, the ambiance of this place is pleasant and comfortable. Haplessly, the workers there disappointed us. How would we went that place if we knew the workers there are dumbos.

The conversation carried like this:

Waitress 1: Yes sir? What would you like to order?
God Dad: Okay, give me this one(chicken) and this one(vege)
Waitress 1: Alright.. Would you like to try our pork?
God Dad: Okay, i take this..(pork)
Waitress 1: For your information sir, we do have new (pork), do you want to try?
God Dad: Okay, i take that then...
(From the sentence above, obviously he ordered the one suggested by the waiter and replaced the one he wanted. Logically, we could actually see that there's no supplementary food for pork, it couldn't be 2 pork meals for a lunch right?)

Continued..

God Dad: Okay last one, this(? forgot lol)

We ordered 4 foods(Didn't notice what those foods called but assured there were 4)

Waitress 1: Alright.. (She signed 5 foods. Without rephrasing the foods and beverages ordered, she ciaoz-ed just like that. It did not comes to our attention because we wasn't know she is a dumbo)
5 minutes later..

Alright, we and Ying Jia were enjoying the awesome dessert/beverages.

10 minutes later..

(chicken) & (pork 2) were served.. Wow it tastes so gooddddddddd..

another 5 minutes later..

Another (pork 1) was served.. We were like "WTF?"

Okay, here comes again:

God Dad: Excuse me, Is this pork?
Another dumbo came
Waiter 2: Err. Yeah, it is, is there any problem sir?
God Dad: We did not order this, so take it away..
Waiter 2: Okay sorry.. (took it and back to the counter)

I was looking at him and he was bitching at the counter pointing to our table. Anyway, i continued eating.. slowly eating..

1 minutes later..

The previous dumbo came

Waitress 1: Excuse me sir, are you sure you didn't order this?
God Dad: Yeah, how possible i'm not sure?
Waitress 1: Because right, i signed your order and i'm sure you did call this.
God Dad: Okay listen, I said i wanted this one(pork 1) and you the one who suggested me (pork 2) Correct?
Waitress 1: Yeah.
God Dad: So.. obviously, i ordered the one(pork 2) you recommended(pork 2) and should've canceled (pork 1), shouldn't you?
Waitress 1: Okay.. sorry..

Okay, peace back.. ^.^

While eating, waiting for the 4th food, me and Ying Jia were peeping at him(God Dad), who were in anger, his face as busuk as busuk tau fu, as red as volcano, will explode anytime.

Okay, time to explode... the Supervisor came. - another dumbo.

Supervisor: Sorry sir..
God Dad: It's ok (He thought the apologize is meant for her dumbos worker.... but.....)
The conversation continued with cantonese, and here's the translation

Supervisor: So what's the problem?
God Dad: It's nothing actually, your staffs misunderstood. I ordered only one (pork) but it came 2 (pork). I said i wanted (pork 1) but she then suggested (pork 2), so i told her, "okay i take that then". In proper regulation, it's impossible we order 2 pork for a lunch right?
Supervisor: okay let me revise your call.

She then back to counter
God dad: Fuck!!!
Volcano Booming...
Me and Ying Jia were scared lol...

1 minutes later

Supervisor: Actually sir, if you couldn't finish the (pork 1), you can take away(da bao)
God Dad: No!!! This is not about we are denying the food just because we noticed that we couldn't finish it. We did not order, so there's no way we deny right??!!!??
God Dad: However, i don't mind you putting 5 foods on check and the (pork 1) included in the receipt payment. I'm your permanent customer, it's up to you how you handle this case.

She then quiet and back to counter.

Volcano boomed....
God Dad: (Strike his palm on the table... BANG), Let's go another place to eat.
Me and Ying Jia were shocked the hell up
God Dad: (Stood up), called "MAI DAN!!!" (payment).. Hand in pocket reached his wallet, took his platinum credit card and threw it on the table flatly.

Impatiently, he took back his credit card on the table and walked to the counter. Me and Ying Jia were looking at each other and then:

The 4th food wasn't serve yet..
Brandon: Lets finish up the dessert.. Don waste.
Ying Jia: Okay...

Argument ended...

The wasted lunch costs more than RM150 if not mistaken..

Disclaimer: There's no exact dialogue because there's no recorder. Some of the words are there/not there. I write based on what i thought but the points are there

=========================================================================


Pasta Zanmai was the place we headed straight away after being caught up in a very very hungry condition. We were famished. Upon entering and scrutinizing the menu, we were spoilt with choices of different varieties of pastas, rice and other Jap dishes. Acknowledged as a fusion of Japanese and Italian cuisine, I got held back a little initially as I thought it was a funny and weird mingle. However, the dishes proved me wrong.

So what we had...

Punch for beverages(God Dad)

- mixed drink contained fruit juice, random fruits(honeydew, watermelon, lime, orange, apple, and papaya)

Our foods.

This was mine

-Ebi Tempura no Gomadare Shitate is a serving of prawn tempura rice topped with curry sauce. The curry sauce just uplifted our appetite and it went really well with the white rice. Prawns were fresh, nothing to complain about. Served together with a miso soup and salad.

Ying Jia and I have been craving for desserts and esp ice cream for such a long time, having this Macha Cha Parfait was a an ecstasy. This elated share was served in a tall glass brimming bountifully with layers of chocolate and vanilla jelly, red bean, banana, cornflakes and scoops of Chocolate ice cream!

~Specially thanks to the argument in Oriental Craving~

Blizzard

I have not been this excited about anything for a really, really long time.

Oh. My. God.


Yeah, no kidding. Blizzard's opened the Diablo III site too, with news and everything =)

If you're anything like me in the gaming world, you'd be high right now. I've been waiting for the release of this game ever since I got hooked on Diablo II, and that was like 8 friggin' years ago. Well I've technically been waiting since I got hooked on the Diablo series, so that was probably like 6 years ago. I was 13/14 years old then.

When a sequel to something is about to be released, I watch/play the movie/game in anticipation for it. This game, for me, however requires about 0 preparation for it. Every holiday season I get myself a game to tie myself to for a while. I think about 90% of these holidays in the past 8 years have revolved around Diablo II. And at the end of every season I tell myself it's over because of how bored I am of it. Only to find myself playing it again, and again, and again. And here I am again at this specific moment, taking a break from the game.

After spending thousands of hours on this game, and another few thousand on other Blizzard games, I don't attempt to question why I get so hooked to them.

The 'official' release of Diablo III has just been announced today, for the 31st of December 2008 (probably the only news I bother to keep up with). They've been working on this game for 3 years but have not announced any news about it until this week, those noobs. XD

But knowing Blizzard anyway, I'd predict it to be released in 2010. But I absolutely love whoever is in charge of these delays.

These delays are what make the game what they are. They can just as easily release Diablo III as a piece of shit tomorrow and still sell millions of copies within the first day of launch. But they don't, because this gaming company (or someone in there who's responsible) has this crazy perfectionist attitude and needs for everything to be perfect before it gets released.

And this attitude never seems to die, and can be seen in the fact that there are still support teams working their asses off to patch, introduce new things and balance games that have been released a decade ago. What's wonderful about this is that the games you play always seem to change, and grow as you grow.

Blizzard Entertainment, you have robbed thousands of hours of my lifetime through your ridiculously addictive games. I thank you for that ^_^.

Equality

I think it's about time I whipped this one out. I've been thinking about this topic for years and I think it's time I finally took a stand on it.

Equality among genders.

My say about women who fight for their rights? Shut up. Yes, it's harsh, inhumane, and annoying. But it caught your attention didn't it? :P Fine, I'll be more specific.

Women who fight for their basic human rights such as NOT to be shot on sight, NOT to be buried alive, I'm totally with that. It's healthy. It's only fair for any human being for crazy discrimination like that to be removed.

Women who fight for equality in workplace, etc., I find a bit annoying. I remember something crux one said in his blog regarding this matter.

"They love to go on and on unequal opportunities in the workplace, don't they? Well, prove it. What information/research did you use to arrive at your conclusion that women aren't given equal opportunities? Because they aren't at least 50% female leaders around? But if that's your yardstick, my my, isn't that no different from the racial quota system we so wanted abolished?"

I could not have said it better. When I read that, my mind instantly lit up and absorbed that idea through my thick skull. It's genius. A lot of what I want to say has already been written in his blog. Stuff about how women are not looking for equality, they're looking for empowerment.

We hear shit daily about how guys should be gentlemen by carrying books for girls, or how we should be more civilized in terms of behaviour in front of girls. It's normal, and I'm sure a lot of you who are reading just think "oh those sentences are nothing, hear them all the time". So I ask of you, please read into those sentences properly and realize it's obviously not about equality. It's inequality that these women are fighting for. Except for a change, they want it as inequality that sides them.

What I say about it is, just put your noob complaint letters and convincing speeches down for a rest and shut up. You ask for so many things, but what about the things that don't side you?

Two popular sayings:

1. Women and men should be equal.

2. In cases of fire in a building, save children and women first.

Two popular sayings that people agree to, yet never realize that they contradict each other. My point for bringing this up is, if you can ask for so many things like to be treated better in the workplace and it really is EQUALITY that you are looking for, why would you agree to saying number 2? If you really wanted your gender to be treated EQUALLY, shouldn't the words "and women" be removed?

My absolute stand is this. Those who fight for equality, make up your bloody mind. Is it equality you want or is it empowerment? If in your opinion we are at a negative state now, your policies about 'equality' should be aimed for '0' or 'neutral', not positive (because that in turn would be negative on the perspective of males). Ever heard of reverse discrimination?
It's bad that women are treated badly in certain ways. It is negative. If instead of going to the Zero, we go to your positive side which is the circle, wouldn't that mean:
that it is our negative side? And men are being discriminated against?

That is what I mean by aiming for '0' or 'neutral' instead of negative.

Once again I'd like to say I'm fine with equality in terms of basic human rights like voting or health but no way in hell will I ever agree to helping someone or siding someone "because they are female". That phrase is ridiculous and ridiculously overused and ridiculously accepted.

I am not an extreme chauvinist who says all girls should shut up. I'm just very pissed off at the general population who just love to go on preaching about how girls should be treated any differently.

I know I'm about to be flamed by people from both genders here but bring it on. I know what I stand for and I know what I'm talking about.

KFC Coleslaw

To the Colonel, for his brilliant invention:


Oh god damn KFC Coleslaw,
You give me diarrhoea,
Of that I already knew,
Yet I still continue to eat'ya.

For God's sakes KFC Coleslaw,
When will I ever learn,
That eating shit like you the mighty Coleslaw,
Will make my asshole burn.

The excrement is an unpleasant brown,
I know this is starting to get gross,
But I'm getting sick of looking down,
On my faeces that look like mashed potatoes:

So seriously all you out there,
Who see me at KFC,
Drop over to say "hi,
and TAKE THAT SHIT OUT OF YOUR MOUTH BECAUSE I'M SICK OF YOU WHINING ABOUT IRRELEVANT CRAP ON YOUR BLOG."

In short: I'z eat colslore n' poop'z all lik smelly n' phunky lookin' shiz.